Strange Substance
by Cryptics
Summary: -Co-written with mushroomhammer of Neopets- Light, L and Misa go to the a cafe. And the fair. And stuff. And Ryuk lieks donuts. Rated for a bout of language.


Light awoke to the soft sleeping rhythm of L's breathing. The pale detective had finally fallen asleep, a definite rarity, and was curled up close to Light's arm. His breath smelled slightly sugary when Light went up close to his face, but then he realised what he was doing and promptly checked himself.

Meanwhile, Misa tiptoed down the hallway silently, not wanting to awaken Light. She hummed a discordant tune softly.

Finally L was fully awake. For a minute or so L just sat like an adorable--

No. No. Light shook his head. He had to forget about this... this infatuation with the black-haired detective.

Misa had finally arrived at Light's door. She stood outside it in silence for a few moments, preparing her "happy girl" attitude. She mumbled a curse in a long-since forgotten-- or perhaps made up-- language, then flung open the door.

"Liiiiiiight!" she squealed. "I missed you so much!"

She nodded at Ryuuzaki, then went straight to Light's side.

Light braced for a heavy hug unhappily. When it never came he exhaled. Suddenly a small tug at his shirt redirected his attention. "Light-kun, do you want to shower now or after Misa-san decides to depart?"

Misa giggled. "Oh, I get it, Ryuuzaki-san wants me to leave so he can be alone with Light..."

Light coughed. "N...no. I'm sure that's not it."

Misa giggled again.

L, exasperated, looked at Misa with contempt. "Misa-san, I simply would like to shower. I cannot shower if Light-kun will not, as we are bound together." He shook the chain, annoyed, but only showing it in his flat-black eyes.

After a long pause in silence, L relented. He took a key from a hidden drawer and did the unexpected: he took off the handcuffs and walked to the bathroom. Shower noises began spluttering and Light was... shocked.

Light was just as astonished as Misa was. "I think... something's bothering him.

Then he realised it was Valentines Day.

"Light... It's February... 14..."

Misa gasped, realising that Light hadn't got her anything.

"Light, you forgot... about me... I bet you got Ryuuzaki something, didn't you?!" she shrieked.

She about-faced, turning away from Light and fake-crying.

Oh, crap. Light shook his head, unbelieving. "Misa, I'm sorry," he said, nearly choking with having to apologize. "But it simply slipped my mind.

L, meanwhile, was stuffing on his usual outfit; white shirt, jeans, no socks.

L walked out to suddenly realised his shirt wasn't white today. It was an extremely pale pink. Studying his shirt, he said, "It seems we had a mishap in the laundry."

Misa spun around to look at this rosy happening, proceeding to giggle when she noticed that L's shirt was, indeed, a very light hue of pink.

She giggled and said in a singsong voice, "Ryuuzaki-san is pink! Ryuuzaki-san is pink!"

L's face twitched with annoyance and relocked the handcuffs. He nearly dragged Light out the room, heading for the kitchen.

Finally in the kitchen, L was rummaging in the fridge and found a strawberry cake. He eyed Light's coffee and impulsively dropped 4 sugarcubes in.

Misa tiptoed into the kitchen.

"Can I have some tea?" she asked to no-one in particular.

"You may make yourself some tea," replied L.

Misa giggled yet again and reached for the cabinet where the tea was kept.

Light had not seen L sugarise his drink and took a sip. It was a disgusting taste, pure, sickening sugar swimming in his now spoiled coffee. He ran to the sink and spat it out. "L! What the fuck!"

L looked at him balefully. "I merely wanted to make your coffee better to drink, Light-kun."

"Sugar is good for you," said Misa. "I read that somewhere."

L suppressed a chuckle.

"Yes? And what's wrong with that!" squealed Misa.

"Nothing at all," said L, "It's just that you don't seem to me the type that would read a medical journal of some sort..."

Misa shook her head. "No, no. It was a womans' magazine..."

Light put a disgruntled yet amused look on his rather handsome face. "I don't believe that. Sugar can cause being overweight and also cavities." He passed his tongue over his perfect teeth and wondered whether or not he would also feel unblemished teeth if he were to tease his tongue around L's mou-- _NO. What is with all these...thoughts?_

Misa frowned.

"Light, Ryuuzaki-san is being mean. Make him stop."

"Misa, I don't know what I CAN do. Ryuuzaki-san

is simply who he is." He wasn't sure if what he had said made any sense but he didn't care. He was mulling over the thought that it was Valentine's day.

L looked away. _I wonder what he'll do_, he thought. I_ wonder if he thinks it'll make me convict him of being Kira if he does anything._

L was chewing on his strawberry, studying Misa's pretty woeful face. She seemed to be listening to someone. Then he looked at Light and rested his gaze.

Tears welled up in Misa's eyes, and for the first time in a long time she was angry at Light.

Ryuk[1 took advantage of this situation to whisper to her, "If you're angry at him, let him know so it won't happen again. Yes? Heh heh..."

Misa nodded at Ryuk, already formulating a plan.

Ryuk looked at Light, who also seemed to be making a plan, but a rather different one...

Light was racking his brain. What should he do for L? He could force him to go shopping with him and casually buy him some sweets, and maybe end up kissing him...and he had to do something for Misa, else she would kill him.

Oh, the woes of being Kira.

Misa looked away from the two men standing into the kitchen. _I haven't the slightest idea what to do_, she thought, _but I will think of something, mark my words._

Passively L was finishing up his wonderful cake. He then attempted to pull Light to the computer, where he could research more.

The woman proceeded to sit on the bed next to Ryuk. She pulled an apple out of her handbag and placed it behind her absently, forgetting that Ryuk couldn't eat it here anyway, due to the cameras and L's supervision.

"Light-kun, could we please go research?

Light frowned. "L, its Valentine's day. We should go out and walk around.

Misa spoke up.

"I agree, let's go walk around!"

Ryuk chuckled passively.

"Yes, I feel like going out, too."

Annoyed, Light shot a glance at the laughing Shinigami. It was like a punkish goth version of Buddha.

Ryuk grinned.

"What, you think I don't like to see how many humans can sense that there's a disturbance in the air? It's a game I made."

Misa sighed.

L was nibbling on his finger, then discovered some traces of whipped cream upon his finger. Infront of everyone, he sucked and licked his finger clean slowly.

Misa audibly giggled at the sight of this phenomenon; Light watched in horror, awe and admiration of this daring feat.

Ryuk just yawned.

L, though not seeing Ryuk, yawned alittle too. "Yagami-kun, if you would like to go out, we should now.

He had purposely returned to the formal adressing of Light.

Ryuk laughed a little at this-- both L yawning(1), and his addressing of Kira in the formal state rather than familiar.

"Yes, let's leave now."

Light was slightly hurt by L's coldness and started out the door, L lagging like a stubborn child.

Misa was in front of Ryuk as Light proceeded to physically drag L outside, and her hand brushed against the Death Note in her purse.

"Why haven't I yet," she muttered threateningly. "Why haven't I?"

Suddenly, L's foot slipped and he began to fall to the floor, though before he hit the ground Light manage to catch him. For a heartbeat they stared at each other, then L simply thanked him.

Misa snapped out of her "melancholy mode" and giggled.[2 "Watch your step," she said sarcastically, causing L to glare at her.

Eventually they got out and strolled around. L would peer curiously at a window here and there, till they arrived at a cafe.

Ryuk floated innocently over a garish table umbrella. Magenta and heliotrope, as fate would have it. He chuckled.

Misa stuck her tongue out at these gaudy Valentine's Day decorations. "What to order..." she said.

"Here, L. I'll treat you," said Light, barely above a whisper.

L looked at Light with an expression of mingling emotions, barely noticeable but definately there. "You don't have to, Yagami-kun, but thank you very much." A ghost of a smile wavered uncertainly about L's pallid lips.

"Oh, I know. I'll get a... hmm, guess I don't know..."

Ryuk sighed, wishing he could order something apple.

"Misa-san, I suggest a strawberry doughnut," L said absentmindedly, now licking strawberry icecream cone.

"Oh, of course. A strawberry doughtnut, then," she said to the lady behind the cafe's little plexiglass window, who looked uncannily like someone you may or may not know.

A few people shuddered as they walked by the little cafe, and Ryuk pseudo-audibly laughed. "Told you, didn't I?" he chortled.

L was unconciously leaning against Light drowsily, slowly making his treat disappear. Light's mind was flaming with innapropriate thoughts. A familiar, somewhat similiar to L, raven haired waitress walked by. You might know her.

Misa sat across from them at the table, Ryuk at her side. She poked at the doughnut, not really wanting to eat it, but not wanting to embarass herself by not eating it.

It was quite a dilemma.

Ryuk, when left to his own devices, had decided that he wanted the doughnut, but Misa shook her head.[3

There the donut sat, on a garish magenta napkin in fron of Misa, cold and alone. L noticed it and some childish engine kicked in. The donut was getting lonely, a voice said. So L asked, "Misa-san, do you want that doughnut?"

Misa straightened up quickly, snapping out of her doughnutty dreamland. "Would you like it, Ryuuzaki-san?" Ryuk out his hand to his heart, or rather, where his heart would be if he had one, and dramatically faked fainting. Yes, this sight caused even the mighty Kira from laughing; he tried to stifle a snicker. "Something's funny, Light-kun?" asked L genuinely. "N...no, nothing."

The donut had reached peace. It was being bitten gently. L chewed, swallowed, put it down.

L also lifted away from Light, his warmth seeping out from the young adult's arm.

Light made a noise in his throat, barely audible, yet L's sharp ears caught it. "You're cold, Light-kun?" asked L. Light gasped a tiny gasp. "No," he said, like a child who has been caught with their hand in the biscuit jar. "You're cold, Light-kun,"(!) confirmed the spindly detective, replacing his arm on Light's. Light sat back in semi-horror, semi-OMGWHATness; Misa seemed to be communicating with something invisible next to her.

It was nice, L reflected. Light-kun was a kind person, even if he might be Kira. He sat there, blank-faced, his charcoal eyes hidden by frays of soft, black hair.

Misa craned her neck to look behind her. She could've sworn she felt someone looking at her. _It's nothing, _she thought.

"I'm thirsty, I'll be right back," she said.

This also gives me a chance to see what they'll do when I'm gone...

She arrived at the small plexiglass window once again.

"Hmm, strawberry daiquiri, please. Nonalcoholic."

"Certainly," said the lady behind the window, with an accent that sounded very non-Japanese. Possibly... Icelandic? "I used to love those as a child, did you know that?"

After a short pause, Misa said whilst reading the JapaneseEnglish bi-lingual menus above the window, "I love your accent."

"Thank you, I learnt Icelandic when I was very young. Here's your drink," said the woman. "I'm Anne, by the way."

"Misa," muttered the Goth-Lolita. She plucked the daiquiri from Anne's hand, then returned to her seat.

L was in danger of fallling asleep. "Light-kun, I'm bored."

Light was startled. "Uhm, well, when Misa is done with her drink we could leave, walk around the mall..."

The black-haired waitress swept by again, swiftly taking away the un needed dishes still lying on the table.

"So, did anything interesting happen while I was gone?" she asked cutely.

"L just about nodded off," Light smirked. The paler detective's face had traces of faint embarrassment but otherwise looked bland.

The two waitresses were whispering about something.[4

"This is boring, Light. Let's go do something else," said Misa, rather like a child who's just been told they're not allowed to play a certain carnival game.

"Finish your drink and we will," Light said, not unreminiscent of an adult, the edge of a reprimand tinging his voice. L was eating away at the sweet red fruit between limber fingers.

"Fine," said the woman, slurping the sweet strawberry liquid.

Ryuk eyed it hungrily. Misa glared at him.

"You haven't got a stomach," she said, just loud enough for him to hear.

_Yes, and __**you**__ haven't got a brain_, he thought.

L was clearly getting confused at Misa's unclingy behaviour towards Light. He scratched his unseeable scalp.

Light noticed that Misa wasn't trying to pull his arm off. he wondered if she was feeling OK.

Ryuk pouted again, jutting out his bottom lip and giving Misa "puppy eyes."

Finally, L noticed, that the drink was less and less until Misa was drinking air. "Light-kun, Misa-san, we should go now."

Ryuk straightened up.

Misa returned slowly and unenthusiastically to Light's side.

"Something wrong, Misa?" asked Ryuk.

She shook her head.

Just then, something adoring and girlish snapped in Misa. "Light-kun, Misa would like to go to the fair, Misa wants to ride the ferris wheel and be at the top with her Light!"

L barely grinned.

"That's not such a bad idea, Misa-san. Let's go to the fair."

Ryuk also grinned, though his was wider and more malevolent.

"Yes, do let's go the the fair..."

Misa snatched Light's arm and squealed ever-so-irritatingly. Her high pitched voice bothered Light's ears and he fought back a rude grimace.

Light sighed inwardly.

He supposed he was angry-- was that it? He wasn't angry at Misa, surely. That was nearly impossible. He had, in fact, grown to love her. To love her as a master loves their slave. Was that right? He supposed it wasn't. Then again, he hadn't exactly been Superman lately.

L was again trailing behind, observing the couple. He was again chewing on a finger, walking in his normal stance. He collected attention from others but was oblivious to it. He was wondering if the picture in front of him would ever occur in his life. Sadly, L figured, that is below 5.

Light was aware of a pair of eyes on his back.

Most likely L's, he surmised. What was it about the fragile-looking detective that attracted him so?

_...No. I mustn't think these kinds of things_, he thought.

But he wondered if L thought them about him, which caused him to blush. "No way," he mumbled to himself.

Misa felt the need to regain Lights' full attention again. "Liiiiiiiiight! Misa wants Light-kun to go on a scary ride with her!" Her legs, clothed with red and black striped tights danced about, her constant motion jerking uncomfortably on his arm.

Light smirked.

"Alright, Misa. Let's go on a scary ride."

Ryuk chuckled. "This'll be interesting."

They reached a huge, swaying machine, called the "Spinner." it looked frightening and L's heart jumped. If they were to ride, he did too. But he refrained to say anything.

Misa's eyes sparkled with excitement. Her black shoes clunked and she jumped. "Liiiiiight, Misa will hold onto you! Look, it's a three seater so we will be able to sit next to eachother!" She rambled on with sweet-nothings and other nonsense.

Ryuk frowned. "What about me?" he asked jokingly.

"Who wants to sit in the middle?" asked Light, with only a hint of malevolence in his voice.

"You, Light-kun! Because of the... handcuffs," she added, spitting out the word immaturely, her young pretty face being obscured by a look of disgust.

L merely nodded, his mind actually sick with fright.

"I suppose you're right, Misa," replied Light.

Ryuk noticed how scared L was.

"Ask him if he's scared, Misa," he whispered.

"Huh? Ryuuzaki-san looks scared, Liiiight! Maybe we shouldn't ride?" she said, as per Ryuk's instructions.

L pointedly shook his head. "I do not want to come between you and Light-kuns...date," he said. The word was bitter in his mouth.

Light glanced at L, a glimmer of suspicion glinting in his shadowed eyes.

In his mind, he laughed the stereotypical villain laugh. Kira. On the outside, he held Misa's hand. Yagami Light.

These defences were impenetrable; it was the perfect disguise, or so he'd have liked to have thought.

It was the trio's turn to ride the Spinner. Slowly all the carts filled and Misa was chattering happily, till the ride shot off and a numbing speed.

L was grasping onto the chain and his other hair inching toward Light's.

Light noticed L slowly scooting (lol, i love that word. oo) toward him. Did it mean anything? Should it mean anything? Was it right to think it meant something when his girlfriend was sititing right next to him?

He dismissed the thought.

"Oi Misa! You like this ride?" he yelled to be heard over the giant machines whining hydraulics.

Misa screamed with manic enjoyment. Her eyes were stoked and you could nearly smell everyone's adrenaline.

L's head was jerked forward and he gasped slightly, his eyes wide open and face full of pure emotion. Light caught this instance of...well, beauty. he committed it to mind.

Light muttered. "Beautiful."

"Did you say something Light-Light?" squealed Misa with yet another petname for her one-and-only Kira.

"No," he replied. [5

The ride, thought L, was gaining speed, if that was even possible. He nearly shrieked, and was suddenly curious what his voice would sound like if he decided to. He experimented and was filled with disgust. It was a loud, deathly noise and wished he hadn't. He gripped whatever he was grasping, which was currently Light's leg.

Light half-squealed.

"Ryuuzaki-kun, did you just grab my leg?" he cried.

Misa shrieked, nearly crushing everyone's eardrums. "Whaaaaat?! Ryuuzaki-san, Light-Light is mine, and you know it!"

In surprise L let go of Light's leg. "Light-san, I didn't mean to," he stammered, losing conposure.

And then what was keeping him from crashing to the ground slipped, and he nearly fell out. Luckily a metal bar restricted him and he was back to safety, heart hammering in his thin chest.

Light impulsively grabbed L's hand, not caring if Misa was watching or not.

Recently-- very recently, in fact-- he had come to the realisation that he did, indeed, love the spindly, half-owl half-human detective to whom he was currently handfcuffed.

If a mass murderer was even capable of feeling love.

L's heart continued racing, not stopping, especially when Light grabbed his hand. His thin fingers wrapped around Light's and a huge wave of...some sort of...feeling hit him.

Was it love?

Love, indeed.

* * *

1. yes, this was just a plot twist to bring Ryuk in. ;-; --Cryptics 

2. i use 'giggled' way too much. --Cryptics

3. And then Ryuk cried "but I liek the doughnut ;-;" tears, the end. --Cryptics

4. Maybe DEATHNOTE:3 --Zaki

5. lol, i almost typed 'nom' instead of 'no' and it made me think 'om nom nom nom nom...'. ;--; --Cryptics

Zaki-sarah-bay's Super Special Note: I put a long period (less than 15 minutes) to co-write and edit this goddang thing but it was so effing worth it. Enjoy this 19-percent crack story. Da- NO. I am actually going to fugging swear here. HELL MY EFFING HEAD IS GUNNA ASPLODE. Also, my account is Crisium. :D  
I'm pretty uhm...nice and love email anyway. If you have gmail we can chat sometime D, dammit! God. I love you guys.

Sorry if I seem...crazy? Idunno. Anyway, now I'm rambling. Bye.


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